Mr. Electra

Wednesday, 30 November 2016

How to make good friends

Well, making new friends is an awesome experience. Friend is person with whom you can exchange your thoughts. Someone with you can talk about anything. A person who inspires you, one who pull your leg. 

Joseph Parry says, "Make new friends, but keep the old; Those are silver, these are gold."


I love talking to new people. When we talk to them their experiences becomes ours. So here are some of the tips that I use while making friends.



Being Likable

Be cool with yourself. The more you find your interests and do them and are happy about it, the more likely people are to also find you interesting. Don't be scared to have a conversation about your hobbies, but don't hog the conversation either.
If you're sweating meeting new people, if you're thinking about how awkward, lame, and embarrassing your last comment about Modi was and how these people are never going to want to see you again, it will show. The solution? Stop. People are generally harmless and too wrapped up in what they're saying to notice much else. If you never see them again, it is not the end of the world. There are many other people on this planet looking for friends, too. 


Be friendly. 

If you're not out there being friendly, people will assume that you're just not interested in being friends. Most humans are pretty easily intimidated and like a sure thing; if you're not receptive, warm, and give off those friendly approach-me vibes, they won't come knocking on your door. And since this is a concept you've been taught since before you could practically walk, you know exactly what we're talking about.


Be willing to listen.


One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say. -Bryant H. McGill

Listening to someone increases comfort level of a person next to you. They are more likely to share their inner thoughts which make them your good friend. 



It is said that, 'When you stop learning, stop listening, stop looking and asking questions, always new questions, then it is time to die'.


Smile.

Greet the people you meet by smiling. It's a friendly gesture that attracts people, shows them you're engaged in your surroundings, and looking to have a connection. Can you imagine trying to befriend a stranger you see grimacing in the corner? No thank you. Make it less nerve-wracking for potential buddies by opening up and exuding warmth.



Maintain open, inviting body language. When you find yourself among people, try to keep your body aligned with theirs (and not toward the door, for example). Keep your arms open and stay off your phone. There are people out in the real world that deserve attention!

Get people talking about themselves.

Too many of us blame the fact that they get tongue-tied and never really know what to say to account for the lousy social skills, when really it's listening that is the more important of the two abilities. People seek friends who will care to listen to what they are saying more than anyone who can talk circles around them. If talking isn't your specialty, you will be just fine without it.
Ask questions. Everyone loves being asked questions and it takes the spotlight off you! Open-ended ones, especially. A one-word response (yes or no) doesn't really take the conversation anywhere and puts the pressure on you to follow up, so ask ones that require elaboration.



Remember details about them. 

How impressive is it when you meet someone once and the next time you run into them they ask you about your birthday, your mom, or some other little tidbit you casually mentioned in passing? It feels so good knowing someone paid attention to you and valued the information you told them. Be that person! Winning friends is all about making the other person feel good.
You can notice details, too. If there's anything they're wearing, carrying, or have about them, ask! Who knows the interesting conversations this could launch?

Put your shyness and insecurity on the back burner. 

People naturally gravitate toward confidence. If you're clingy, they'll all be headed for the hills in no time at all. No need to be cold, but know that whatever your audience's opinions of you are, it doesn't really matter. Be you. That's the best self you can be.
Easier said than done, isn't it? Overcoming insecurity is a process some people never get through. But a large part of it is positive thinking. If the insecurity thing seems a little daunting, try focusing on that aspect instead.

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Mr. Electra is here to motivate you. To provide you with enough juice to keep you going.

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